How do you know, ya know?

pathHow do you know what fertility route to take?  Or which adoption agency to work with?  How do you know when it is time for break?  How do you know when it is time to push forward?  How do you know which path is best for your family?  How do you know if this opportunity is the right one?  How do you know?

Interview with Katherine Nelson


It hard to describe in words how much I adore this woman! Katherine and I met as young mothers with lots to learn and we were able to watch and uplift each other as we did just that … learn. I have always been impressed with Katherine’s willingness to allow God to direct her paths in life.  This created space for beautiful opportunities and experiences for her. One has been creating her Born Brave CD. I absolutely love the messages in this album; very real, daily medicine for woman and truly inspirational! Go to to buy your copy today!!

I invited Katherine to share a little more insight into her experience with her song “What’s Mine is Yours”. It a beautiful song which captures emotions surrounding the loss of a child, an unplanned pregnancy and hope through adoption. In my opinion, it is the NEW ADOPTION ANTHEM! (Watch out Michael McLean! :)) Open adoptions have created a new world in which we have new relationships with birth families and adoptive families, some of that involves “sharing” more than we use to with closed adoptions. “What’s Mine is Yours” expresses tender feelings of gratitude shared by both sides as we acknowledge “what’s mine is yours.” Along with that, we are all given an opportunity to offer appreciation to God for His children in our lives; as what’s ours is really His.

Interview questions:

How has this song changed you?

Writing the song What’s Mine is Yours was such an incredible experience. For the first time I understood that there can be more to writing a song than a fleeting moment or few moments of inspiration. Beyond just wanting to create this song and carve out this message for the circle of women in my life who have had similar experiences, I discovered there were floodgates of inspiration and emotion in creating the song, as though at times it wrote itself. I cried my eyes out reconciling those emotions of brave Birthmothers or women with misscariages over and over on that piano bench looking for the right words to use. What a gift on all sides to engage in that creative process.

What has been your most memorable experience with this song?

Hard to say. Could be the woman who embraced me after a recent show who said after she heard the song performed the first time, she and her husband, though blessed with many children of their own, felt compelled to adopt and have since welcomed a new little member to their home! Or the time my dear friend Addie introduced the song on stage with me, opening up her heart sharing her experience in adoption. Or the time I sang this song to a room full of women who so happened to have in it both a soon-to-be birth mother and the woman who would be adopting her baby. Powerful moments. Powerful love to witness. The song has touched not only my life but so many others which is exactly what the measure of it’s creation was meant for.

Tell us what your experience was like shooting this video?

Shooting the video was crazy for many reasons! Mainly because it was a one-day shoot! Nuts! I was literally moving my entire family across the country a day after and was all over the place mentally. But emotionally we were a wreck as a film crew, tearing up every few takes considering the fragility of life, the diving deep into the message of the song. Didn’t help that it was winter and I vow (over and over…everytime) that I’ll never shoot in the cold again….winter happens. Video shoots can’t all be exotic Hawaiian vacations, I guess. The warehouse we shot in last was gorgeous! and frigid:/ All in all, a really cool day.

What has been your experience entering the adoption community?

I can’t say that I have become an embassador of the adoption community. It’s still just a love for these women and their stories that bring me to it’s doors with this simple song as an offering. I can say that the women involved in the adoption community possess more love and compassion for the human spirit and family than any other I have met. I am amazed at their willingness to sacrifice, to put their hearts on the line as often as they do. They love and value life. They understand and define family.

Thank you Katherine for sharing your kind and loving heart with us!! The many conversations Katherine and I have shared about adoption and the writing of “What’s Mine is Yours” inspired the creation of Ahava Adoption Circle. It is truly the love shared in our adoption community I want everyone to feel and be encircled by. So come and feel the love!!

Who do you call for adoption advice??

Anyone who has adopted, has questions. Am I doing this right? How did you create a positive relationship with your birth families? Is this “normal”? Why is my child behaving this way? Have you ever felt this way? Do other people understand where you are coming from?

At first, I would call my close friends and family. If I was really concerned, I even called my adoption caseworker. I NOW call other ADOPTIVE MOMS!!! They are the only ones (aside from Heavenly Father) who truly “Get it”!!!

What brought you to Ahava?

I LOVE the intimate connection I instantly have with someone when they come up to me and tell me they have adopted children or they placed a child for a adoption or they have a loved one who adopts or placed a child. It happens all the time in my world and I LOVE it!! Has this ever happened to you?